Greatest Story Ever Sold

Mary's got it all for sale
But it ain't worth a night in jail
Never quite what it's supposed to be 
And honey can't play no tricks on me

If you want to know everything I know
You've got to get a couple more miles down the road 
Hell I'm working on the greatest story ever sold 
I ain't young as I am old, I ain't young as I am old
I ain't young as I am old, Honey I ain't young

All them rounders who think I'm a tramp
They don't know that I'm a champ
Rumor rollin' round the neighborhood 
Is if Nashville won't maybe Hollywood

I'm goin' back to the place I'm known
Where my secret is safe and my cover ain't blown
Hell I'm workin' on the greatest story ever sold
I ain't young as I am old, I ain't young as I am old
I ain't young as I am old, Honey I ain't young

Hold my anger, hold my gun
Hold my temper, and hold my tongue
Hold your dagger underneath my chin
Leave me holdin' the bag when your ship comes in

I told cousin John if it ain't too cold
I'd let him dunk me in the river and save my soul
Hell I'm workin' on the greatest story ever sold
I ain't young as I am old, I ain't young as I am old
I ain't young as I am old, Honey I ain't young

Lyrics by Matt Bastardson